Here’s the time of the month again when I turn to a monster…Or werewolf maybe? Or vampire?
But it’s bloody red.
I’m just irritated by everything. I don’t want to talk. I’m too emotional. I’m easily pissed off with just a simple noise, misbehavior, comment, and scents!
Now, consider the fact that I’m a teacher. I need to deal with a lot of people and this is time of the month that I’m too lazy to even say hi. I want to be on my own little space. But that’s impossible. I have more or less 55 students to deal for one hour. And that’s on repeat for five classes a day.
Lately, I had said nasty things because I was too irritated by students who dared to sleep on their desks while their classmates are explaining something. I made it a big deal because they are in the star section. Ugh. Never in my teaching career that happened in the highest section. That’s why my expectations of students put in this block section are just high. This year is soooo different! And they’re too noisy–noisy in such a way that their combined voices don’t just enter your ear and leave but it go deeper until it reach literally your mind then it’s like a noisy tornado swirling everything inside. Its so horrible I want to puke.
Then in another class, a student was slouching on his chair and I hate that a lot too. Then on another, someone kept on asking whether they should copy the questions or not when in fact you repeated more than twice that it is answers-only. Another, due to the heat of a second-period afternoon class, the room got this sweaty smell. And should I explain further how awful it was?
Then during my vacant period, I was just silently sitting on one corner, sulking because the exclusive item I was planning to buy was already bought, someone commented why I was so serious and silent. Oh God, I hate such comments. I’m too tired to explain my freaking introverted self! Just leave me alone!
Okay… Inhale… Exhale…
Not that I’m being impatient and mean. Actually, I’m one of those patient and kind people distributed in this world. Maybe. But now, it’s that time of the month, okay? There are things I can’t control and right now it’s my irritation level. I can’t tolerate things. I don’t have the plan to adjust by the way. The only thing that I want to deal with and that puts me into good mood is food, food and food.
Just give me time and it will pass after seven days or less.